;i keep up with a fake smile.Do you ever notice?



I FAKE A SMILE ALL THIS WHILE

DID YOU EVER REALISE?

It's me.So what?
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*Rena Heng
*aka Tiny,Nana
*17*
*30/5/89*
*TP,Hospitality and Tourism*
*PRSS,QNPS*

Her world revolves around...
*her friends
*family
*you
*her lovelies =3
*clubs
*drinking
*shopping
*bitching
*freedom

BEWARE,SHE SNAPS
I'm not who you think i really am. Don't like reading wat's here? Buzz off. =)
DO NOT JUDGE ME,period.

HER WANTS
*New navel stud*
*plain bikini*
*Waist belt*
*A pair of flats*
*Grey/white off shoulder*
*tan*
*Vintage dress*
*New phone*


THE ONES

Abigail
Adler
Arjuna
Audrina
Alpharian
Alvin
Boon Ern
Daphne
Daryl
Dixon
de-bonbons
Eugene
Genevieve
Hailing
Hakim
Hidayu
Hisa
Idy
Jacquelin
Jeslyn
Jingxuan
Justin
Jie Hui
Karen
Kok Sheng
Letitia
Pauline
Quan Zhang
Qiao
Royston
Stephanie
Shihan
Siok Wen
Sihan
Wei Li
Wei Jie
Weslie
Xiuqing
Yi ting
Yiwen
Yu Heng
Zhiyi
Zhu Xiaoming
Ziying
CUT THE CRAP

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TUCKED AWAY

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

9:12 PM

Back from NLB!!! Borrowed 7 books...Woot. Gonna keep me occupied for a while...


Michelle called me up and jio-ed me out to town tmr! Pei her buy pressie tmr...Gonna pei her to some chalet on Thur...gosh. It's gonna be so weird can?! People i don't know and all...waah...-.-
Well! It's time to make new friends during this hols too newae! =DD


Back to reading! Bah...just felt lyk bloggin..
some hearts are meant to be broken;;

12:57 PM

My head felt all heavy and my throat was sore from all the coughin. A terrible night. Another night of tears, another night of memories i just couldn't put away. What's my world becoming?!


Benedict(pri sch mate), called me up last nite. Oh, yea, i met him at my cousin's wedding by chance...He was my first boyfriend. *rolls eyes*....He started with all the "hey you got a bf" talk and things started to get a lil outta hand when i repliled with a "no". He started to tell me how much he missed me and all i was pretty much disgusted.Ok, VERY DISGUSTED, PUT OFF. Bah... It seems ironic to be disgusted by your exbf eh, but well, i was..-.-
I shocked myself when i hung up on him. Ok, i'm feeling a teeny weeny bit guilty about tat now. I guess, it's even more difficult to even continue as friends after dat phonecall last night ... Seriously, i don't even wan to be friends with him now. He pissed me off so bad i wondered why did i like him in those previous years. Ah. Whatever.


Ok, if you didn't think that was bad enuff...


I was chatting away on Msn last night when someone(ok, he's a frend of someone close...he should have known ok..) asked if i was still attached. (WTF do these people want -.- ) Said no. He told me he wanted to know where did we used to go on our dates when we were still together. (WTF!) I told him i forgot even though all those memories of places we went together flashed in my mind one by one. *POOF!* My mood was gone.Tio low diaox. Wanted me to give him advice on this and that...blah blah blah....-.- How to please his gf lar...blah blah...-.-
*POOF!* My mood became more jialatt...
Sometimes, i'd wish these people were more considerate and smart to know better not to ask these kinda qns when they know how heartbreaking just reminding me about it is. I'm no love expert, I'm no love consultant or whatsoever! So, get off my back. -.- Call me selfish or whatever, i just don't like it. Even couples getting all touchy gives me the lows nowadays. Yea, i'm jealous, you got a problem with that?!
Shit. My mood was ruined totally.


So much ran through my mind last night, i've come to realise. Only victims of a broken true love know how painful it is to fall into it all over again. Haix. A crappy post. tata~


[i tried hard to put all the pain all away. But a different stranger came along everyday and rediscovered memories i thought i had forgotten.Now, i have to pick myself up all over again.]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Monday, November 28, 2005

10:28 PM

Here i am! Back from bugis trip wif my mum...Bought a knitted top...(wee~can go wif mua bikini!),a corset lyk dat de top and new nail polish(can glow in the dark de!)! You know...sometimes i don really like goin shopping wif mothers...eRmx...They sometimes just rip you off your interest in something you like. But my mum was super nice today she jus kept nodding, "ok" when i tried on pieces i like..Muahaha! And the best part was, she paid for everything today. =p Tralala~* I'm a happy girl today...=D Except i didn't have the time to look for earrings to add to my collection! Oh well~


There's something wrong with my computer speakers! It's getting on my nerves! It gets louder a sec, then softer another sec.WTH's wrong with them! AAH!!!!


O yea..back to last nite at Hyatt Hotel......Started with cocktail serving at 7pm..The dinner started at 7.30pm.Oki...I looked terrible ugly yesterday can...Without any make up(how the hell did i thought of going to attend a wedding without any make up?! And my cousin's at that!Ah! I'm so angry with myself lar!)..And my get up was horrendous. Urgh. Everyone of my female cousins were all dressed sho nicely lar! All wear nice nice de bridal dress lykdat...AH! Toopid me! I regretted not making time to the bridal shop to get my lil dress...-.-
I was practically busy trying to shoo away from the cameramen who were always goin,"hey! Wendy! Get your cousins! Let's take a snap.." Wadda hell~ Well well, i felt quite...erm...odd at tat. It was until i was called up to join the family for the traditional "yum seng!" that i had no choice....but to er...strut onstage in my minis and pong pong blouse. I felt so silly...

So many people were drunk last night ok..Lol..It was so dramatic i dunno how to describe....The last part of the wedding was filled with almost non-stop 'yum sengs' at every table which Michelle pulled me along to join the fun...Diaox. First time i downed glasses of wine at that. Ok, I couldn't count. People just kept filling my glass i couldn't keep track of how much i drank. I went round to like 5 tables only ok,but my glass was refilled for every 'yum seng' there were at every single table...WAh seh..Seh Diao..All my cousin's friends....20++ de...Then all drink very well de lor! I was the only xiao mei mei who was there...strugglin to cope with the amount of alcohol i was given.I guess they all thought i was like already 18 or whatsoever. -.-
I AM NOT AN ALCOHOLIC OK! I ONLY DRINK WHEN NECESSARY! lol...SERIOUS~!!!! SWEAR! MY MUM CAN VOUCH FOR THAT! LOL!
(wow~how convincing was that...) Even my mum had difficulty getting me away from all those siao siao drinkers there...Michelle was one of em! She siaox one! But i like her. She's so happy-go-lucky lar...always smiling de! =DD She told me to go clubbin with her once i reach 18... Waah, tat's so long...She wants to see me drunk! She say de! Ok, she's one who'll make all the guys go O.O WTF?!just looking at the amount she drinks ok...Erm...i guess i'd better bring a partner along when dat day comes...He/she can help me tackle her in terms of drinkin~! =S
MICHELLE! IF YOU HAPPEN TO SEE THIS! I SURRENDER LIAOX AH GURL! YOU DRINK JIU HAO! I SEE SEE CAN LIAOX! AND CAN HELP YOU CALL CAB HOME!LOL. =X


=) Well, this wedding's supposed to be not so much of a grand one...It was my cousin's second marriage...So...erm...yea...
Ps: Wendy jie, I wish you and Ben zao shen gui zi~! An everlasting marriage this shall be! =DD


Eugene kor kor's getting married soon too i guess! Next year bahx...Lol! This time around i shall not forget bout my lil bridal dress,a nice hairdo and makeup...I'm booked as the bridesmaid le! Lol...=))
Sometimes it makes me so envious just looking at my cousins getting married, one by one...it makes me wonder how mine would turn out to be...Or would there be none? Lol..Seriously, i just love weddings! Really! I'm crazy...tata~


it's off to NLB tmr with my gurlies! Books! Here i come!

[i'm confused...i'm lost...I just need someone...Someone like you...to guide me along...]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;

12:29 AM

Back from cus's wedding..I think i drank too much...My cheeks are flushing red...THANKS TO YOU MICHELLE!!! YOU REALLY GOT ME DRINKING GAL!We'll keep in touch yea? =DD Lol...loads of drama...shall elaborate more tmr...The wedding was great...The setting was so romantic can! Pink roses and all...Wahh...~*swoons*~~ It makes me wonder how my future wedding's gonna be like...well...or will there?? Ah... wotever~


Now my eyes are blurry...I can't seem to see properly...Jialatt liaox...-.-


Tata~ off to chong liangx! To Bugis (hopefully) wif mua ma tmr!It's her off day! Woot. More shopping! (i hope...)


Drama shall be elaborated tmr....bb!
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Saturday, November 26, 2005

8:43 PM

Sometimes it gets so frustrating you wanna end it all.
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Friday, November 25, 2005

10:26 PM

The trip to SP today was a waste of time. It wasn't an open house. Just a day filled with activities organised for O level graduates.Open house would be in Jan... Bloody waste my time. Urgh. Could have slept till later...Head felt heavy all day...Giddy...Medicine made me felt like puking. A bad zit day...Bloody kns lar.


Mood tio low suddenly upon reaching Bugis...donno y also....I felt so crumbled...Haiz. Guess it'll be worse tmr...Cousin's wedding's tmr...wedding dinner's on Sunday..I'll be lyk so freaking bored all day i guess. =(( And you'll find me sulking in a corner or somewhere quiet. Haix. I just wanna be on my own for a few days i guess...Decided to stay home next week..unless there's a trip to town to get my skirt for prom or a trip to the NLB....Hopefully i'll get a reply from Starbucks soon...Or i'll have to approach my dad then...I need a job desperately for my days to get by...Sigh.


Shytty. I've been tryin to change my blog music but the Geocities site appears "currently unavailable" all these while...Ah...I deleted my original one in the end....-.- Toopid lar!


Haix. Tio low again...Bah..tata~
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Thursday, November 24, 2005

10:47 PM

I'm feelin awful...giddy and all after eating dat shytty cough medicine...Instead of making me feel better, it's makin me cough even more...Kns. Haix. The bloody doctor waste my time...i went there yesterday, it wasn't open. I went there today, the nurse tell me the doctor won't be back until Saturday,but i can get the medicine. WTF. Called my mum and she didn't believe me. So i decided to pass the phone to the nurse and let her explain. Shyt her. Why can't she just believe me!? This sorta thing i also wanna lie to her isit! Tmd...Xiang le jiu qi! @%$$%& Urgh. Whatever. I quarrelled with her again. Fuck it.She keeps askin me stupid qns. She likes to rummage through my bag recently. Shyt. I hate it when people invade my privacy without permission. Even if it's my very own mother. My days couldn't be any better eh...-.-


I've filled up the application form for Starbucks! All i can do now is to wait for a reply from Huixin who will help me ask her manager..Well, if Starbucks don't work out for me, guess i'll seek my dad's help...He told me he'll be able to get me a job easily....We'll see how it goes...Seems like there're a lot of people who'll be workin in Tampines area....April got a job at Cafe Cartel! Ah meng, i tink ish Swensons....=))


I lay on my bed for hours today after reaching home...did loads of thinking. I realised i've led a bad life all along. I didn't do anything good so far tat was worthwhile looking back on i guess. I suddenly felt as if i've been a failure who doesn't know what to do with my life. I remembered Isaac asking me what i hoped to achieve in my life...Seriously, i don't know now. I don't know how to live the present. I guess i'm one who'll always tend to look back and live in my past. I'm just lost. I even realised i don't think before i do certain stuffs. I do them in a fit of eagerness and when it dies, everything just comes back to square one...All the enthusiasm just dies off. Haix.
So much things has chanced upon me during this period of time..I had to juggle personal problems and studies. It wasn't easy...Not a wee bit easy.People believed that i'm strong and will grow stronger after tiding over the numerous crisis. Not many knew what happened. Even those who knew didn't know everything. Facing the passing away of my godmother. Facing a broken relationship and dealing with a broken heart. Facing the risk of having my parents divorcing each other. Facing the numerous conflicts i had with friends. Facing the kinda impression i have to impose on others. Facing important examinations i had at hand. Facing MYSELF. It was too much for me to take i admit. I've managed to tide over the crisis but i haven recovered from them totally...deep scars have been imprinted definitely and scars remain where they are.
I cry quietly thinking about my god mum. I cry quietly when i hear my parents quarrelling in the middle of the night. Who knows i do? No one.
Someone asked me why have i lost faith in relationships. I couldn't give an answer. It's just fear. Just a feeling inside me that's keeping me away from them. I don't know why myself and i guess i never will.
There are so much things that keeps me thinking. But i will never have answers to these questions on my mind. Who will be able to answer them for me?


[i longed for a hug. There wasn't anyone to give it.]
[i longed for a heart to heart chat. No one understands me, so what's the point]
I'm jus dreading the days i have to live my life lyk dat....
some hearts are meant to be broken;;

12:17 PM

I scared myself when i saw this....O.O

YAwnx...Stayed up till 3+ to finish another book on Sadie and Kevin...Kinda a draggy story...but nevertheless manages to keep me occupied! =))


I miss my long hair days!! =(((


Everybody's out..Qing and Josh went for Jalan Raya... Stephen and Ape will b out for BBQ or sumthing lyk dat...Stephie's got choir...Henry's workin. And here i am...left...........to........wait.........for........1pm to come......
Will b meeting Angelia for lunch...then goin for interview....It's to the doctor's after dat then back home...cough cough! It's getting worse liaox....=((


Haix, i'm dead bored....bb~

some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Wednesday, November 23, 2005

10:27 PM

Wat a day...

Lows....
1)Emptiness...
Fucking empty i dunno how to describe. I left home feeling all so cheery and all but now....I'm fucked up. Quarrelled with mum once i got home...Kpkb. I hate it when she does dat. Before Os she kp, after Os she also kp. WTF does she wan man.


2)I just cut my hair, i tink it looks kinda weird on me. I dunno....Mebbe not used to it bah...


3)I lost one side of my earrings! The star star one!!! Bloody hell. Tio saddened...I loved them! And now they're gone...gone...gone...=((((((((( I just realised i keep losing things i like... Haix


4)So many ppl smoked in my face today. Can't they see the fucking sign above their heads?! It's stated, "Look here, no smoking". So many ppl smoked near me while i was waiting for the bus...So i sat beside an auntie who was having her ice cream..=D Seriously, i hate smoke.


5)Quarrelled with mum..so i guess i'll have to come home after goin to Starbucks tmr...Shytty bom! Hainx...


6)He's scaring the shit outta me by telling me dat. Fuck. I do not know how to deal with tat. Ah!!!!!


Wat a day. Haix. Bye..i'm off to search for my earring...=((
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Tuesday, November 22, 2005

10:43 PM

They are the ones...

Oh my goodie!!!!! Lin Xiuqing! I lub you!!! muackies! She was sweet to write me this...-->


x[Rena]x
hmm.. eh.. u muz be grateful that I wrote this today.. coz I thot of startin my entry tml.. hehe. this is to cheer u up.. dun be pissed off k.. SMILES!!!! :)rena rena rena. hmm.. my fren since last yr but our friendship is better at the end of the year. I guess it was the examination that brought us together... such a lovable fren to be with. always so happy right. many unpleasant things had been encountered but u proved to be a strong person. and u did. really u did. be proud of yourself *applause*.. hahakz.. (okay i'm gettin a little crazy here. erm.. maybe u can ignore it ar..) a great pal to be with. esp when it comes to shopping.. definitely we will go crazy about it. that's girls' nature isnt it. (yipee) someone who strives hard in everything she does, can look up to that is. what about someone who always there for u in times of unhappiness. and will listen to all your woes and sorrow. and never fail to cheer u up. right? hahakz.. okay.. but juz beware of her. coz she has a secret weapon to protect herself.. shhhh.. that will be a secret shared between us.


Here it ish...for my darl darl Xiuqing~~~
Hey babe! Hee! You're a hot sassy girl who never fails light up my day with your smile!!! =D She always protect me from monsters lyk Josh who loves bullying the shorter class...=(( I know i'm short, can't help it...isn't my fault mar...=(( Hee... Let's teh him together!
I gotta know her since last yr...She seems pretty cold but once you get to know her, you'll know she's one who'll ki siaox together wif you when you feel like it yeah?! =DD I love hanging out wif ya! Not forgetting out bunch of "ear-holes gang" lol! She's very serious towards her studies...dat's a good thing ok...don't be lyk me...siao siao..bo chap de...*shakes head* no good wor! =D Let us keep our siao-ness till the end of the time yar? I really appreciate you for being there for me when i'm always feeling down...i needed the support and you gave me just the right help! =)) Lurv ya to bits girls! (and again! I'm straight! She's straight too!) =D


Well, another gal, who's always been by my side no matter wat happens...It's you darl STephie! Hee...you're busy mapling...=((
I wanna tell ya this too...I LUB YA! Hee...^.^ You've always been a jovial lil girl in my heart..who never fails to bring laughter to me whenever i'm down. She believes in herself, she believes in what she wants to do! Tat's a good thing...We've known each other for long, and we know we'll continue to be such close friends! Newaes...i won't forget bout the 'clubbing issue'...=D
Woot! Last of all, muackies muackies muackies!


My mood has taken a lift...thanks to these two gals who has created such an impact in mua lyfe...=D


I thought about Christmas suddenly....=( no plans, no nth...It's lonely cold X'mas for the yr i guess...Well...bb.
some hearts are meant to be broken;;

8:14 PM

Wat a toot face...-.-
Yea yea...zi lianx...i noe...=p
Look so shu nu! ERpx! -.- So not me...LOL

Guess what.......

O LEVEL'S OFFICIALLY OVER !!! *CHEERS PPL!* =DD

Seriously, i don't feel much excitement. I'm not enthusiastic about the 6 months hols i'm gonna av down the road..In fact, i tink this 6 months is gonna kill me..In a way. Well well...
However, it'll be few days of craziness up next before i start workin~Gonna get my hair cut at Storm tmr wif mua girlies...hur hur!Cut short? Hmm...we'll see....I'm dying to get my hair coloured...Guess i'll do it after prom's ova yeah? =)

Then it'll be off to fill in my applications at Starbucks Tampines...Off to da movies after dat! I wanna watch Harry Potter! I wanna watch Exorcism of Emily rose!!! There are so many movies i wanna watch lor...=(( We'll see bout that tmr..
I feel darn proud of myself today ....I chucked all my worksheets and packed all my books in my room today within an hour! Hee....Spick and Span! Weehee~ =p Now my shelf is filled with only books borrowed from the library...Muahaha!

Met up wif my cus today at Fisherman village after dinner for a while.She said she had stuff to tell me..She cried hard.. Well, i now seriously think guys suck.They think they can just escape reality after doing something irresponsible.Kns.Fuckers they are, some of them.*rolls eyes*...I shan't elaborate... Bloody kns..Shytty ger, she's smokin! ARGH!!!Well, i mean, ok, i don't hold anything against ppl who smoke but...I just don't lyk it. Urgh.
Well, hey gurl, i can't assure you i'll be here for you all the time but if you need me, don't hesitate to gimme a call yea? And for that bloody fucker? To hell with him. i'll make sure i shove his legs up his mouth if i ever cross path with him. He thinks making out with another girl is perfectly alright when he's with you? Right. It's fine for him, not for me. YOu can forgive him, but i'm sorry, i won't be able to tolerate anything lyk that. Moreover, he's done it to you, my loved one. Fuck him. He's a total jerk i hope he didn't even met you at all. Why don't he get a taste of his girlfriend making out with one of his male friends? huh? Ain't tat what he fucking did?! He cheated on you gurl, ain't no man's worthwhile waiting once he cheats on a gal he claims he love. Fuckers. Jerks. Guys. WTF. Don't lemme see you jerko, i'll keep my word. =))

I'm pissed. Real pissed. They say gals put on masks and pretend to be who they are not in front of the opposite sex to attract.Fuck the person who said that. Some guys just put on "wow" masks and pretend to be who they aren't in order to impress. You won't know it till they show their tails...*wriggle wriggle*

I"m not sayin all guys are lyk dat. However, I'm directing this to all the good men out there. Well, men, some of your breed just fucking donno how to behave. I'm sorry i have to say this but..Well, jerks will always be jerks.


[i can't wait to see you eating your own shoe. Damn you.]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Monday, November 21, 2005

10:39 PM

High fever.Cough.Bad sore throat.
WTF. I just got back from the 24 hr clinic. Josh and Stephie were nice to send me home before that...I'm was bloody shivering all the way after watching "Sky High". Walked alone all the way to the nearest 24 hr clinic. Walao eh...so far lor! So dark ,so scary summore...-.- My legs are seriously numb from all the walking. Didn' know why suddenly so sick. I wrapped myself up with a blacket while typing out this entry....Haix. What a good time to fall sick. =( Last paper's tmr..i didn't even touch my books all day...Jia latt...must wake up early tmr to study le...=((


My mind's in a whirl now..Seeing fucking double...tata~


[nobody bothered]
[All i wanted was for you to hold me tite once more,you weren't anywhere to b found]
[fuck. Just leave me alone.]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;

12:46 AM


Erm..Ish that the Xmas deco for da yr??
Hur~toilet! =p
AT small mac wif Qing~
On train...mua girlies!
T.r.i.o

Century square toilet ish a gd place to zi lianx!!

Wawa~

Hee~ more photos....another day bax...!Lazy to upload lehx...another day perhaps...=D


Woot...It was down to town again..Walk till my leg pain ka....-.- buay tahan...I never knew shopping could be this tiring also neh...gd form of exercise..! Hiek hiek~ Stephen say i rou rou!!! Bloody knS!!!!!!!!! Sobx....Fat fat fat fat fat!!!! WAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! =((((((

I shall start my daily exercise routine from nxt week onwards!! Lose the pounds baby!!! =))

Had difficulty finding my prom stuff lor...bloody hell, find till pek chek. Went to Shibuya...the dress i like ish gone!!! T.T sho bought a black halter top there...haven found my skirt yet...-.- No time liaox!!! =(( O yea! Now i got 5 earholes! Hiek hiek!Pierced today...~ SHhHhh....my mum didn't realise, she'll scream if she were to see it...O.O

WEnt to my mum's workplace...she treated us to oyster mee sua!! Nice!!! =DD I saw the lady who gave her trouble at work. Tmd. Fat lyk shyt. My mum say she always sit around doin nth...Hur....she so fat! How to walk around! Tmd...bully my mum i nxt time i give you trouble! Kns! Her boss knows that she's been skiving...she's gonna fire her soon! Boo! Hiek hiek!~ *evil laughter* My mum's workplace so warm lor...=(( See her work till sho xin ku i a bit xin tong...haix. Just don't understand why did she quit her previous job....import/export de..she told me she wanted to do food business de dong dong...-.- Well, like mother lyk daughter. I would love to open a cafe nxt time when i grow up! Hee~ I love working somewhere where people can just chill out with their friends..have a nice chat and have good coffee...Woot...It's been one of my dreams since young oki! =X Well, dat's one of my reasons for wanting to work at starbucks during my Hols...hehe..=D

Shytty bom! Nose bled...Cough...Sighx, tink too heaty liaox...My throat feels sore...And i've been coughin non stop ever since i reached home...Urgh...Down more water REna!!! -.-
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Sunday, November 20, 2005

12:46 AM






Photo whoring!!! Woot...It was out to town today wif bunch of gurlies(qing,hannah,fidy,april) , stephen, and henry...


It was loads of walking walking and more walking at far east...Loads of stuff there wor~ Walk till my leg pain ka....cannot tahan...Was supposed to get prom stuff, but ended up lookin at other clothes! Lol~~ Prom dresses so difficult to find...ma fan lyk shyt...If i know jiu don wan go le...=(( I couldn't find my espadrilles, my white sequin earings and my dress...=(( Even after goin to topshop to look for it also cannot find suitable de!!!!Urgh...I ended up looking at other clothes that can wear out de~~ Loved one red and white top...didn't get it. Not worth lor!!! Sho ex..=((
there were so many other things i wanna buy!!! But didn't get them today..Had just enough money to get my prom stuff...lol~! Another day perhaps!

Qing and Ape pierced their ears after much pestering from me! =p
Nice nice~ nxt time can shop for earrings together liaox!! Muahahhahaha! =X


O yea! Saw one really cute guy at topshop today...Think he's in his early twenties...Hur hur~he's what you call a total cutie who'll look good wearin anything can!? Bet the gals agree wif me...Didn't stop ogling at him....Hur~~=X Whoops. Well, guys who looks good wearin a blazer, with a good hairdo,good fashion sense indeed gains some bonus points for himself~!! I'm not hua chi oki! There's nothing wrong with admiring good looking ppl....=) Saw 2 chio bus today! Woot! (hey, rmb?i'm straight) Great fashion sense...not too thick make up...*smiles*


Hee, let's see what i bought today...
1)Dejavu Fiberwig mascara[24 bucks]...(wanted to get maybelline de..but the lady say use this one nicer~Woot. Japan brand lai de)
2)3 pairs of earings...[14bucks](one of which i tink stephie darl will lyk! twirl twirl de!)
3)orange diy top...[for a low 5 bucks]( Yes, you didn't see wrongly, 5 bucks...damn cheap rite...cute leh...i lyk =p)
4)A handy mini make up brushes kit[2bucks]
5)Makeup remover cum toner[7 bucks]
Spent bout 50 bahx...hee~It's shopping spree part two for tmr!!! Paragon mebbe? Anyone else game to go?


My schedule's packed for the nxt week...
Mon--> either go study for Sci or go walk walk!
Tue--> Sci mcq exam!!! [last paper! woot!] To k box after dat....
Wed-->Go cut hair mebbe? =D
Thur-->eh...i rmb i'm booked for the day..but i forgot what for..anywaex...
Fri-->Singapore Poly Open house!!!!
Sat-->Cousin's church wedding
Sun-->Wedding dinner at night!


Well well...when will i ever get down to find myself a job....Haix...WEll, i deserve this break do it? =))


Tata~ it's more fotos tmr!
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Friday, November 18, 2005

1:10 PM

Today's history was crap.


Fell asleep on my couch once i reached home this morning. Slept till 12. And i'm still dead tired.
WEnt to sakae for lunch...We started of with Stephen askin the poor training staff loads of qns, Joshua tipping his glass of ice lemon tea over and Henry falling off the bench....LOL! The trio were funni. I almost fell off my seat. Well, what prevented me from falling was stephie and qing qing. Stephie and Qing Qing today change target liaox, all never bully Josh. They keep hitting my pi gu!!!Piak!! O.O Keep poking my sides!!! Stephy dong dao wo de....ermx....na bian a lot of times!!!! T.T
I feel as if i've been molested by a lot of times today...lol. By gals! T.T Hur hur~ All ki siao today, but guess i'm the most siaox among all... I started lala-ing today. Lol..Held hands and lala-ed Bad Boy(cascada) today....~be my bad boy be my man~ lalala~ Stephie's my lala partner! =p
O yea, hey, holding hands between gals are bloody normal ok. Jus as long we know we're straight. Lol~ So long never hold someone else's hand, today hold stephie's hand later jun wei come hack me....Shyttty...=X


Went to bugis to shop...Bought a tube top...Saw the top previously in Tm de...$34...i got it at deal of 20 bucks at Bugis street. The same one lor! Exactly the same! I got the blue one!!! Woot...More shopping tmr and Sunday at town wif 9 other peepx!!! I can't wait. So many ppl today...Saw a familiar face at Bugis Junction. Dressed in purple tee. He was shyt. Doubt he remembered me. Just as well, i hope he doesn't. Hur!


The journey back home was so hilarious i couldn't stop laughin once i come to think of it. Some gal was bio-ing joshua....Lol! Then when we told him, he got all so full of himself and started to strike poses to gain attention..!!!WTH!!! Diaox!!! -.- It's sho farni can! It's fun to go shopping wif this bunch of people who are always so full of life. =)


My leg is hurting. Guess my old injury's back to haunt me. Damn it. Today walk a while jiu very pain. Kns. I'm feelin all weird all over now. I got butterflies in my stomach. Dunno why. My eyes are dry. My legs hurt. I got a fuckin headache. WAAHH!!!! T.T sobx
I'm exhausted ....lack of slp. Didn't slp a wink last nite. And here i am...still typing out this entry at this time...Lol....My eyeslids are getting heavier....but i'll not be slpin early! I'm gonna do some reading tonight....=))


Tata peepx.Photos soon~!



some hearts are meant to be broken;;

4:23 AM

*low*
Look at the time...it's 4.23am....I've studied for almost 5 hours straight...Can't get anything into my head. WTF. I ended up hu si luan xiang. I'm broken all over again. When can i get rid of this pain within me. I jus wan someone to take me away from this place forever and let the people who loves me forget that i've ever been around. I'm such a good liar at times i kinda scare the wits outta myself...I hate being the way i am now, but i can't help it. Yea, what a pretence or whatever you call it. I don't give a fucking damn about how ppl see me now. FAke. Attention seeker. Bytch.Poseur. Whatever. Tat's me if you wanna judge me in that manner. To hell with you if you think you know me well enuff. Cos you fucking don't. Seriously, i hate ppl who tells me he/she knows me too well blah blah blah...WTF. You're not me, you'll never understand.


I jus wanna shut myself out from this world and cry my heart out lyk nobody's business. I jus wanna disappear into thin air. I'm hoping for the end of the world to happen only to me. I finally understand why people commit suicides. Know something? I've spent the past hour researching on them. WTF.Yea yea...call me an attention seeker by goin," there she goes again...suicidal tots..." Blah...blah blah...Shyt you. I got no idea what's happening to me. Well, all i know is i'm gonna have an emotional breakdown. Soon enuff. YOu'll see. Rena's goin crazy. I feel oh so empty inside i don't even have the courage to face myself anymore. It's not my PmS dat's acting up or whatsoever. It's just feelings i've suppressed for so long. I need to get it out.What's making me feel worse is people who don't usually care as much are caring a lot rite now. People who should care are not givin a damn about me. I hate it. Why are things turning out this way. Why isn't everything goin right for me?! WTF's happening to my lyfe. I need someone by my side. But not a single person in my life will be able to fill up that empty space now.I thought you'd be the one. However, i've come to realise, It's too late.
I've lost ME. So what's the fuckin point.
I'm not the Rena you used to know anymore.
I'm not me, and i will never be the same again.


the poseur says bye.
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Thursday, November 17, 2005

10:19 PM

I can dream on about wanting to sleep tonight. For i have loads to complete for History!!!! WAAH!!!! I can't seem to get anything in le...=(( all the information on Russia, China, blah blah...is makin me go craziEeEEeE~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Woot, no sleep tonite. I'll try to mug till daylight. Lala~ I have a feeling i will fall asleep on the table...-.- Sighx...nvm, i'm lookin forward to tmr's Sakae trip!!! I wanna watch exorcism of Emily Rose tmr!!! =(( Dunno if the peepx can or not...Haix! Well well....I'm gonna sleep till 12+ and meet em at 2 tmr!!! Hur~! Paper's at 8-9.15am tmr...So damn early...-.-


Sighx, i'd better get started now..or i'd won't be able to complete de...tata~

[just when i needed someone to be with me, i thought you'd be there. Guess, i think too much.]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;

9:52 AM

Run-by Snow Patrol
I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done
And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it any where
Away from here


(chorus)Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you can not hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear


(bridge)
Louder, Louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say


To think i might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbyes
I nearly do


(Chorus)
(Bridge)


Slower, slower
We don't have time for that
All I want's to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads


Have heart, my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if its just for a few days
Making up for all this mess


Chorus
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Wednesday, November 16, 2005

8:29 PM

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!-.-


I'm fuckin exhausted. I'm fed up. I'm pissed. My eyes are hurting. My head is spinning. I jus wanna go somewhere where i can scream my lungs out and nobody will think that i'm a lunatic or something. I'd wish somebody would jus slap me awake...


Shytty day. Spilled my milk all over the floor in the morn. I wasn't wearin my contacts, was sleepy, didn't see the glass and knocked it over. Kns. Needed to mop the entire floor...Kena scolded by mum. She thinks i purposely spill de arh! Think fun arh! Early in the morning kena scolding very song isit! I say i clean up jiu clean up lar! Kp so much. Knn...I mop 3 times somemore ok! Didn't touch Poa at all in the morn cos of that stupid glass of milk. Luckily never cut my hand or else i'll be more pissed. Urgh~~ *&%!#&


Poa today was totally crappy. I kinda screwed up the paper. Didn't know how to reconcile Purchases ledger to control account. Didn't know what the hell was control accounts and journals for when asked to explain. I crapped my way thru. Tmd. Spent so much time studyin and all i study de never come out..No amalgamation, no subscription acc, no I&E qn...Waah!!!!
=(( No A for Poa anymore...Tmr's Poa MCQ...hopefully the paper will be easy... -.-


I need a break badly. I have no mood to continue studyin le...WTF's gonna happen to my History on Fri...To tink i studied so hard for SS...and now...perhaps my His paper will be screwed up too....Haix...


Bye. Lazy to continue le...Gtg bathe, study...
[Shyt me.I hate myself]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Tuesday, November 15, 2005

8:02 PM

Right. 2 hours of sleep. I'm fucking tired. Slept bout 3+ and had to get up at 5 to get ready for school. Could hardly pry my eyes open when i left home. I wish i can jus plonk onto my beddie,snuggle up and sleep. Dream on...have PoA tmr and the day after..History's on Fri and i haven even touched the book.Kns. Gonna study till late tonight again i guess. =(( Luckily tmr's paper is in the afternoon at 2pm. -.- Lunch anyone?


Well, what a morn.Hazy.Made my eyes uncomfortable oni...
Witnessed a couple quarrel when i was walking to the interchange. -.- In the morning jiu see this type of situation.. tio low sia. Saw Ace...On the way to school i guess. Kept me thinking about how early i have to wake up if i were to choose Ngee Ann 's Mass Communications(if i'm able to qualify tat is!!! *pray*)..If not, i'll consider Hospitality and Toursim Management or CMM in TP bah...Shawn's in HTM, i didn't know until Qian told me..Well!
Pengx. I have no sense of direction until now...dunno what course to take...dunno what poly to go to...Bah.Feelin crappy. I realise i don't have a sense of direction in any part of my life at all... How good is tat?! =(


7 days to end of Os!!!How fast is that! Woot, i can't wait. Already have programmes lined up for this week liaox...Sakae on this Friday...Shopping in town, cum job seeking with gurlies on Saturday and Sunday...Have to go cut hair soon on 23rd Nov. I look erm...shytty... Bah...gonna go Kimage at Funan Bahx...have to book...Sianx 1/2. Ma fan leh... -.-


WEnt to study wif Qing, Josh and Fidy today at RC 839...Couldn't concentrate. All of us ended up taking short naps there lar! Haix. No jing shen...It's been 2 hours+ of sleep for 2 continuous days to rush out my art le.Finally it's all over! Muahahahahah! Stephie! Be proud of me! I didn't fall asleep and i completed the whole thing in time! =D
Qing and Fidy left early to sleep..leaving me alone with Josh and BK. Diaox! Josh was trying to act out the scene in Jay Chou's album...the song Ye Qu having Jay playing the piano or something like dat.So farni..Lol~ My stomach hurts badly from luffin too much just looking at him acting silly. Lol. Just don't ruin Jay Chou's image!!!! Hur hur~
I admire Joshua's ability to always keep himself in a good mood and still make people laugh even if he's troubled himself...I won't be able to do that. I guess i'll bring down people's mood even more lar...It's a joy to have him around in a group. =)) But the thing is, he's always busy entertaining the few of us, he ends up not studyin much. Hehe.


Benedict and gang joined us after a while...Felt so weird can?! I was the only girl in a group of...erm....5 guys. Well, i left soon after they came. Daddy was sweet enough to drive me home after much pestering. Lol....


Well, I've yawned umpteen times while typing out this entry...I'd better go freshen up and start studyin before i end up sleepin at 3 again!!! Sb sian!!!! One large zit has settled itself at the bottom of my left cheek. AHH!!!!!!!!!! Not enuff slp=more zits=ugly!!!! T.T


BB~
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Monday, November 14, 2005

8:28 PM

Shytx. There was something wrong wif angelfire's hosting...Cannot host song! Bloody kns....T.T...So i changed to geocities...so dear stephy...if ya read this, pls remind me to help ya rehost yar?? =))


Sigh, I'm oh so tired from today's art...I'm so tired i feel like puking.Really!!!Ok. I puked...Haix. Have to complete 3 colour schemes, development and captions by today!!! Die le larx...=(( Tat's lyk...A LOT...Somebody help!!!! Slept at 3+ ...got up at 8.15 this morn...Sorry Siok Wen and Xiuqing, overslept... yAwnx...so no breakfast for the day....It's art for tmr! 8am-11am lorx...3 hours! Sit till butt pain arh....I'm so bloody exhausted i hope i don't fall asleep halfway while painting tmr...Lol. Have Poa on Wed and Thur...Friday's History and i haven even laid my hands on the books. -.- Monday's the last paper! MCQ for Sciences! Weehee~


Totally *low* when i got home today....Dunno y. Just, didn't felt like tokin to anyone...I practically ignored everybody when i got home...Perhaps, i'm just....well,lack of energy to do anything else except to daze. WTF's happening to me. Haix.


Bye...Off to complete ARt, or i won't get my sleep tonight~
[i'm a good liar. Shyt me]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Sunday, November 13, 2005

11:14 PM

A long day yeah...yAWnx...I'm all tired from doin...nothing!!! Lol...completed 4 PoA qns...half of Art coursework...sb sian! Shytty bom! Went to pasta for dinner at 9~ late seh. Tailong lar!!! He took my black bangle...=((.... Had no appetite. Guess i was too full from the fish and chips in the afternoon~Met Qian and gang..Xing Yi jie was there!!! Glad to see her doin fine~! We've decided to meet up soon! =D Nth much happened today...Except Joshua tried crooning to Rob Thomas's 'Lonely No more'...Lol.So farni.Made me have the urge to go K box-in!..So poor thing, fell from bike.He said Hydil was too heavy....Wahaha! Bo skill say arh!Qing Qing could do a better job~ =p Ok. I shall be nice and say thank you to him for making me feel better.He's a nice guy...it's her loss bro~~~you'll find someone better with your sense of humour and all...Just stop saying i'm short. Hey, it's good to be petite ok....=p=p Lol...Shou pi hou! Gam xia hor! =p...He won't read this anyway.... Blah Blah...-.-


Stoned all the way home while listening to this song...
This song's for me me me!!!! Lub it...Credits to Qing~ ^.^
Ok..i need slp badly...but gotta rush out leftover Art...Gotta go sch tmr....8.45am...wah piangx...Somebody help me!!!! =((

True- Ryan Cabrera
I won't talk
I won't breathe
I won't move till you finally see
That you belong with me
You might think
I don't look
But deep inside the corner of my mind
I'm attached to you


I'm weak, it's true
Cause I'm afraid to know the answer
Do you want me too?
Cause my heart keeps falling faster


[chorus]
I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing that's true
So I will not hide
It's time to try anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true


You don't know what you do
Everytime you walk into the room
I'm afraid to moveI'm weak, it's true
I'm just scared to know the ending
Do you see me too?
Do you even know you met me?


[Chorus]
I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing thats true
So I will not hide
It's time to try anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true


Tata~gdnitex everyone~
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Saturday, November 12, 2005

11:06 PM


Wanted to play pool, ended up watching a movie with fellow folks...It's been so long since i watched a movie...I watched the last movie in Sept...Wow~I've so many movies i wanna catch. Memoirs of Geisha, Harry Potter, Exorcism of Emily Rose,Doom, etc~!! So many lar!!!


The show is nice!!!Ok, i admit, the show made me wanna tear larx...so touching can! Felt like just huggin someone in the middle of it...Hahahahaha~!!! ERmx...stephie was also tearing.Qing was too far away... Joshua's outta the qn...-.-""" Lol....
If only i have house like Elizabeth's!!!


Reese Witherspoon plays ambitious medical intern Elizabeth, who works at least 20 hours a day at the hospital. She was on her way back to her sister, Abby's place for her matchmaking session when she got involved in a road accident and fell into coma.David (Mark Ruffalo) has been apathetically searching for a new apartment in the housing market, while attempting to overcome his wife’s death two years ago. He finally finds the perfect place(Elizabeth's house), with a good couch(he's a couch potatoe...waddaya expect). Lol.Elizabeth shows up(as a spirit) and claim that the apartment is hers, and it becomes ever clearer that Elizabeth doesn’t remember her past, and shows irrefutable signs of being a ghost. David helps her regain her memory and when she finally finds her body lying in the ward in the hospital she worked in, time was running out as her sister decides to remove the respirator...I shall not go on for the interests of those who wants to watch it...hahar...but newae...the ending was so sweet can!!! However, one conclusion from watching the movie...No matter how hard you try to forget your woman, when another comes along, you'll move on, and love the next one even more...Hao xian shi lehx....Haix. Well, if you're lookin for a movie dat can make you laugh and cry...this is it...=) Watch it with ya other half. You'll find urself falling in love all over again with each other from watching it. Lol...kk...exaggeration..Go catch it!!!


Nothing accomplished. Hoho~ It's till tmr den~!!! 12pm at 830...
10 days to end of Os!!! Woot...


I was sitting alone on the bus...Bah. It felt weird. I don't know why....Haix.
I'm feeling bloody empty today...Blah...*low again*
Still havin flu...Shytty bom!
BB~ off to chong liangx and continue wif art.... -.-
Wat a day....
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Friday, November 11, 2005

11:25 PM

urgh. fuck. outta shower, down wif flu, slight fever. Fuck!
Ah choo~* sniff sniff~ URGH!!!!!!!!!
some hearts are meant to be broken;;

9:45 PM

I embarked on my art coursework today at Qing's house...didn't really do much...sketches...blah blah...So much for chionging...Haix. It's 8.45-11.45am at school on Monday for art lessons! Last min preparations till then!!!
=( Anyway, i suck at art...wonder how did my As in Art came about so far anyway...-.- Tuesday's dooms day... 3 hours straight...Pi gu tong!!! lol...


T.G.I.F...I'm dead exhausted. All i want now is to have a strawberry mask placed onto my face,listen to some music,have some peace while reading a book and go to sleep after that... Phew.Well, seems like i can't...gonna do ARt till i buay tahan go slp...Can slp late late tmr! Meeting Qing at 12 tmr...muggin POA and His!!! I've been yearning for the weekends to come around!!! Woot...it's finally arrived. But well...i still have to study...-.- Makes no difference eh...


Math paper 2 was ok...Had lyk 1 hour to check my paper...Lol.The circle properties qn made me go blur blur...so many alternate segments and alternate angles!!! Do till i cross-eyed..>.<>
Did the vectors qn for section B...many did the graph one instead...lala~i felt the vectors one was easier leh!!!! This time around the qns i did for the past few papers were mostly different from others de!!! I did those qns the minority would do..WTH!!! Bah....whatever...nvm.


Well, 6 papers down! 5 more papers to go!!! Gambate!!! It's halfway through the exams and i'm already thinking about what I want to do after Os...Well, planning ahead is a good habit you see!!! =p If only that was so for my preparation of Os...but newae...ya... This is it!!!!

1)Cut hair...short??hmm...='(
2)Get prom dress cum cousin's wedding dinner dress
3)Get my espadrilles!
4)Get clothes...Bugis/at town shopping sprees wif fellow gurlfrens!!!
5)GET A JOB!!!!!! god...i'm desperate.Any job lobangs???!!!!..considering Starbucks or 77th street though...lurv smell of coffee.Love clothes..so.....wee!
6)Finish reading all the books i've borrowed by Dec1 and get more!!! I love the National Library.
7)K box sessions!!!! SESSIONS!!!
8)Meet up wif fellow seniors! Xing Yi jie! Yi Rong! I mish ya jies!!! =D
9)LOSE POUNDS!!!Go running everyday! ERm...at the gym downstairs dat is...treadmill..hur hur.
10)Guitar lessons!
11)Make up lessons, beauty courses...(mummy want me go...it'll be interesting though!!! =D ) REVAMP! RENEW! woot...
12)GEt my hair dyed/highlighted!
13)Get items cleared off my wishlist~
14)Redo my blogskin~Boring...Dull....it needs a revamp too!
15)Stay home for a week...i need reflection after so long...haix...I need to find my real self...It'll be one depressing week! But in order for me to feel better, well..tat's the way! =)


Blah blah...aight~tat's all folks~ jia you!!! 11 more days to go peepx! =D


[i've been waiting, waiting for the rainbow to appear so i'll be able smile once again just thinking about the fact that you're also looking at the same side of the rainbow...]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Thursday, November 10, 2005

8:40 PM

I'm happily eating my maggie mee while typing out today's post...blah blah...
Well, don't go "oi! eat maggie again?! Not scared hair drop isit!?Order fastfood or go out buy lar!" Too many people av been telling me dat liaox...I hungry marx...=( nothing at home to eat,sick of fastfood, jiu eat maggie lorx...lala~ok...NO MAGGIE MEE FOR TWO WEEKS!!! I shall keep to tat... *wee~ slurps...yummy,hur hur~*


I came home a happy girl today...Borrowed 6 books from the National Library today, bought Cleo mag...hur~! These books will keep me occupied for quite a while...I already finished reading one book today liaox! Fast boh?!About a couple in their teens, one a Protestant and the other,a Catholic determined not to let any things get them down despite being forced to get separated.Escape's the key,giving birth to a child is another....=p Lol! Sounds familiar? Hiek...I love the topic on countries divided now....muahaha! =p


Tmr's Emath paper 2 le...Didn't do much practises today.Ended up reading books =X..Only did 2003Nov paper...jia latt siax....=(
*i'll pray and sleep early* Gonna chiong art tmr!


[i am afraid...I cannot cry because i know that's weakness in your eyes. I'm forced to fake, a smile, a laugh everyday of my life...i should have known better...]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Wednesday, November 09, 2005

8:42 PM

I couldn't resist the temptation of listening to music and bloggin my night away....hur~*
NO EXAM TMR!!! Finally, able to rest for the night.*snore~*..well...here it goes....


"wo ming tian yao jie hun le...Zhe shi wo men zui hou de ji hui..Rang wo men hui dao yuan dian hao ma?" guy pleads with tears welling up in his eyes...(Wahur~hur~charming eh....* =X)
"Yi jing tai wan le...(sobs) Wo de wei lai shi Xu Zi Qian, ni de wei lai shu yu Yunxi!!!" gal runs off crying...(wahh..saddened...=( )


Sounds chummy..*chuckles* who cares anyway....i like the show( though it's senseless at times and the storyline suck.I lyk the songs leh! Yiwen send mie pls....=p Hur hur~*)
Yea...i'm referring to Wang Zi Bian Qing Wa again.... After watching the show, I can't stop wondering why guys can be so 'puo ma' at times...They can tell you how much they adore your prescence and they can tell you to leave them alone when he doesn't want you around. WTH??? Xi huan jiu hug hug, bu xi huan jiu kick one corner arh! I just don't get guys.(ok, mebbe not for my dad, cos i can't wait to tell him to stop being over protective or whatever you call that....Bah.)
Well, not surprising anyway, i don't even get myself. *rolls eyes*
Relationships? Well, it disgusts me at times. But i still can't stop reminiscing about the good ol' times...well....Sigh. It doesn't matter now i guess...


Woot. 13 more days to end of Os..Time passes real quickly huh....=)
Social studies---Source based Qn was easy...Chose Sri Lanka to do for Structured...if only they gave more time....Haix. Well, on the whole, it was manageable...
Math Paper 1---Others except the water qn and the number sequence were a breeze. Even the pros lyk Qing Qing couldn't do the water qn...well well...I want my A for Math!!!
Chemistry---Shytty paper. All those i emphasized on didn't come out. Manageable. Zinc chloride is the salt i got!!!
English P1---Didn't have time to check! Cos i dozed off for 10 min...Urgh...Too tired from yesterday's into the night muggin at RC near 830. Newae...Chose the qn on tourist attraction...compulsory qn was persuasive speech writing.
English P2---Manageable...(seniors who's taken the paper said their papers were easier...Kns. Different paper)
Physics---Another shytty paper...Bah.I must listen to Qing Qing next time!!!Relying on MCQ!!! Guess A for this is gone....=( Haix


Die lar..Haix..tink English no A liaox...No mass comm liaox...=( Second choice bah...mebbe hospitality and tourism management? I dunno...*pek chek* Low diao le...Honour roll? Ha! Fat chance!


Hiek~ guess what, it's already 8+ and i still haven taken my shower...REached home bout 7+..
I don't smell oki!!!!.The whole of me still smell of Hugo boss's energise!!!! Guy's cologne!!! Joshua TAn!!!! He's a ninny. He spray on me!!A lot somemore!!! Kns!It's nice, but so strong lar!!!!!!The lady who sat beside me must have thought i'm very "man"...LoL! Joshua Tan ish a ninny!!!! April must go teh his ni!!!! lala~ =p=p


Ok, i saw a replica of xiao da bian today while waiting for the bus...nearly puked. *vomits*


Lazy to do anything more tonight...All my energy has been used up today in the 3 papers...yAwnz...i just wanna have a good shower, listen to music and sleep the rest of the night away now....It's to the National Library tmr i guess....At 10am... chiong math P2 arh!!!!


[Hui dao yuan dian]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Sunday, November 06, 2005

11:55 AM

Sunny Sunday morn~ =D a pleasant day ahead,I hope...


Feelin sleepy...managed to clear off all Social Studies Qn Papers and 1 Math paper one up till 2am...Got totally knocked out after dat on the table...yAwnx..Now my neck is aching lyk crap. My arm is slightly swollen. Dunno What's the cause. Shyt. And what's more. FLU. URGH!!!! T.T


It's back to studyin for now i guess...Jus felt lyk bloggin...well...tata~
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Saturday, November 05, 2005

10:30 PM

...1 more day to BIG OS!!! WAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =)) happy muggin everyone~
Happy muggin Rena...~ lala~


Had a long day...
It's to 830 to study todae~Rained kinda heavily in the morn...make me wanna slp later can?!~ Today joshua ride bicycle tong pang me...Den kena rammed into a stationery van....-.- My leg got one blue black!!!! WAAH!!!!If i noe i don't pinch liaox....!! Hmm, been always scared of having someone to tong pang me lorx...cos got once my cousin skid, den i got bruises, from then on don dare...god knows today still tio!!! Bah...but now not scared le...Muahahahaha!!!! However, i hate tree branches. They kept getting into my way today....*GRrRr~*


Met him today...well, it's kinda weird making the first move to talk to him....But newae...everything's blown over...a junior will always remain one...I shall not draw a distance. He seems fine so....Hmm. Blah blah...


Proceeded to the India prata shop wif Hydil,Ahmad,Josh,Qing...Omg~ up till now, my stomach still feels very bloated from all the eating....I love the Indian rojak!!! =D
Hiek~ we've come up with the new theory of the "lame-tivity series"...Hur~ Hydil ranked me the 4th outta the 5..*Erpx*
Did some photo whoring at the new neoprints shop at Century...Wahaha....The story about Godzilla and the lame man....well...the story continues....=p=p


Been looking out for familiar faces today...but to no avail...Well, whatever.


I'm so dead tired from all the walking, studying, crapping today. I've decided to stay home tmr...Chiong SS and Math!


gdnitex everyone~
[wo kan zhe na hui se de tian kong, tu ran xiang qi ni wei wo cheng zhe san, yi qi zou...
Wo zhi dao bu neng zai liu zhu ni....ni ye bu hui dui wo shuo yi sheng "wo ai ni"...Wo men zai ye mei ban fa chong xing bian zhi zhe duan lian qing...]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Friday, November 04, 2005

10:45 PM

Just got back from BK not long ago...
Completed 3 English trials, 1 SS topic, 3 Chem topics...
It's SS, Math, Chem tmr! Piah arh!!!!!~


Had loads on my mind when i had the urge to blog, but now dat i'm here...I ended up blog browsing again and have forgotten what i initially wanted to blog about...lala~
Anyway....ya....the BK guy is gone....gone...gone~~LOL...I'm not hua chi oki....


Blah blah...whatever....lousy post.


BB~an early nite~ =)
some hearts are meant to be broken;;

12:06 AM

It's torturing to have to deal with dreams i shouldn't have. It's shyt. I can't stop dreaming.It's becoming an everyday issue. It makes it worse when i wake up and realise they aren't true, and that everything goes back to normal. If this were to carry on, I'm definitely goin to go crazy. Damn it!!!


Was browsing through blogs. One of Huey Wen's entries about guys are oh so true.I've become so agitated after reading it. Sighx. Men are heartless creatures who'll treat you so coldly after a break up. But looking back on the days when you were still together, he's a beautiful soul who's always there safeguarding you, showering you with all the love you can possibly have. You want him back but knows that he doesn't feel the same about you and you draw away from that intention,wanting to be still good friends. Guys. WTF do they really want. WTF do you really want from a girl who wants to be still good friends and is trying to be a good one to you!? Yea. You treat her right with cold replies. You treat her right by telling her you feel uneasy about her being around you. WTF?! I know it's not easy but if she's putting her heart in to do it, why can't you guys do it as well?! T.T
Sighx...It makes a girl lose faith in love upon thinking that she'll lose his friendship if they were to break up. Well, at least that makes one here, tat's me. It's been these few days that everything is haunting me again. I realised i've become so reliant i feel uneasy even walking home on my own, taking a bus home alone,even being home alone is so frustrating. It's not a habit. It's just the emptiness you have inside just thinking about the person who used to do lovely things with you. You pass by spots you used to hang out together, you go to places you used to go to together, you do things you used to do together,you see shadows of the both of you everywhere and you start thinking if the other someone will think of you when he/she passes these spots and does those things as well. Haix. Forget it. It just gets more frustrating the more i continue...


I'm waiting for Stephie, Qing and Josh to come while bloggin...it's just another 2 days time to Big Os...Thanks for all the encouragements you seniors gave...I greatly appreciate your care and concern for me all these while...I promise to work hard!


Bb~
[wo men de ai zhen de yi bu chun zai? Ni shi fou hui ou er xiang qi wo? Ni zhe yang zhuan shen li kai, shi bu shi hai you hua shuo bu chu lai? Dang chu bi ci dou bu cheng shi dui dai...wo shi bu shi ying gai zao yi li kai ni de shi jie? Wo bu yao zai cai ni dui wo shi bu shi yong le zhen ai...Ying wei ji ran wo gan jue de dao...wo xiang xing ni...Ni de xiao rong wo hui yong yuan ji de...Ying wei, wo zhi dao, ni shi wo de zhen ai. Wo zhen de hao xiang ni, dan shi, wo hui xue zhe duo kai.]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Thursday, November 03, 2005

9:22 PM

I just realised i'm getting uglier. Urgh. =((


BAck from Yiwen's house after watching Wang Zi bian Qing Wa~ Completed 2 chapters of SS and a lil of Chem...3 days left....can start counting the hours...
-.-" *cold sweat*
The show nice lor!!! Touching...*swoons*
Hee! We zi lianed lots today...hats...muahaha! I lyk the army one!It's the one her brother gave her...He in army get de wor!!! I also want!!! Yiwen told me to join army to get the hat....-.-
Here it is! zi lianx duo~

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Lemme tell you....Jay Chou's November Chopin is bloody nice! I wan to buy the CD!!!!! T.T
The songs all sho nice lar!I got em all on my mp3!!!Hmm,there's a little different about his singing in this album compared to the previous ones though...The styles of music are different to an extent...But newae! It's still nice! So go geddit...=) I lyk Ye Qu!!! I lyk...all!!! Hur~ but my fav is still Shan Hu Hai...^.^ It's been on my mp3 on repeat mode and is my blog music now!!! Woot!!! =D Lub it! I lyk sad sad de songs.....can make me cry all i want to.lol.


It was stupid how i could have forgotten my keys again. Had to walk all the way to the place where my mum was fishing at to pick em up...Took a short walk back home after dat...Something seemed amiss. I began to hu si luan xiang again...Sighx. Shan't harp on it any further...


Off to chong liangx~bb.

[i hate you for not letting me be able to forget you]-adapted from tv series~ *swoons!*]
[if only....]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Wednesday, November 02, 2005

8:05 PM

For once, i hoped i was someone else...


Fuck it. It's like 4 days to Os and i'm still here, wasting my time bloggin. I find it hard to concentrate. It's getting real taxing.


Just finished watching Wang Zi bian Qing Wa...Stirred up some emotions within me...I hoped i was someone else. I want to stop pretending to be someone i don't wanna be. Tmd.


It's Zhiyi's b'day today! Hope you've enjoyed ya day out with stephie and weslie yah? Sorry didn't pei ni today...Happy B'day~!!!


Off to yiwen's house tmr...


[nan guo de shi qing zong you hao duo, shang yi ci dui ni wei xiao guo hou, bu zhi dao wei she me, wo que wang le wei she me hui nan guo. xian zai ni you ba wo da hui yuan xing, wo you zuo hui yi ge bu xi huan zi ji de wo.wo hao xiang tao bi. wo hao xiang fang xia yi qie li kai zhe li. zai wo you yao liu lei de shi hou, wo hao xiang ting ni zai yi ci dui zhe wo shuo,bu yao hai pa,you wo zai de yi tian,ni yong yuan dou bu hui shou dao shang hai, wo jue bu hui rang ni diao yan lei...]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;

10:25 AM

-Sunny morn
-sweet dreams
-won't be true
-tears streaming down my face
-fuck. there goes my day.
some hearts are meant to be broken;;
Tuesday, November 01, 2005

10:41 PM

My mind is in a blur. My limbs feel numb and weak. I felt crappy about myself all day. I didn't know i gave people that kind of impression.I was happy to see you. But I felt lyk cryin after seeing those msgs. I felt lyk crap.Maligned. Total rubbish. You made me feel bitchy. Right. I am a bitch. Fuck it.
Weaving stories to grab attention? It never crossed my mind. I don't need it from you.I fucking don't need it from anyone now. I spoke the truth. A simple gesture.Just friends,I won't hope for more.My heart's dead. I didn't lie. Swear. However, if you think i'm such a person, i just have to tell you, you don't know me well enough. I'm upset. I'm pissed. I'm , well, whatever.It doesn't matter anymore.I'm tired of always having to explain things and end up feeling miserable. I shall not harp on it, or i'd be portrayed as an "attention seeker" again. Fuck. Fuck it. Fuck me. I'm shit. the whole of me. Damn.


I suppressed those feelings for the whole day.It was terrible. I exploded while walking home. I slammed the door in my mum's face. Fuck. I never do the right things do it?

Ps:
Stephie:i'm sorry stephie, i just wasn't in the right mood...Tnx for "pei-ing" wo today...I wouldn't know how my day would be like without you.


Joshua: Ok. No pinching.


Isaac: Ok. Sorry for being late. Now you know the reason why i shoo-ed you off at the entrance. I'm sorry. And thank you...


[Fucked up]
[I keep tryin to find my way, but everywhere i go, i get so confused]
some hearts are meant to be broken;;